Monday Scramble: You're hired!
Monday, July 27, 2009
Welcome to the Monday Scramble. If we knew how to say “hole in one,” “ace,” or “Want a free car? Play golf in Canada,” in French Canadian, now would be an appropriate time to do so, eh?
• • •
• Shankin’ it off the tee: More exciting... Monday finish at the Canadian Open or saying “Toonie”?
• Donald Trump hosted both U.S. Junior championships this week at one of his golf kingdoms in New Jersey. He was a very gracious host – up until the match play portion began. Rumor has it, the loser of each match was rushed to Trump’s boardroom and subsequently fired.
• An alternate definition for “links golf”: What Stewart Cink does on Twitter, i.e. linking to pictures of himself pouring Guinness and orange juice in the Claret Jug.
• Which major championship trophy will Sam Alexis bring to her first show-and-tell?
• Do you think Tom Watson has ever played Nintendo Wii?
• Phil Mickelson, previously known as an In-and-Out fanatic, is reportedly buying a lot of Waffle Houses. No word yet if a Double-Double Waffle will be added to the menu.
• This might sound crazy, but it ain’t no lie: unless our hearing is dying faster than MySpace, the Late Show band played the song “Bye, Bye, Bye” by ’N Sync during Stewart Cink’s introduction last week on David Letterman, where Cink read his Top-10 List. All we can say is: Why, why, why?
• If Tom Watson had won the Senior British Open, it may have been more impressive than what happened last week, considering what happened last week.
• If PGA Tour events were only 18 holes, would more people watch. Actually, how about 9-hole match play?
• The most interesting thing happening in golf right now is the battle for spots on the U.S. Walker Cup team.
• If you make a hole-in-one only after your ball ricochets off another ball already on the green, are you really allowed to brag to your friends about it?
• A guy named Bop Clampett created the character that would become “Tweety Bird” in 1942. So it seems golf and Twitter were destined to go together.
• Also destined for each other: a job opening on John Daly’s new wardrobe design team and a 3-year-old with a box of highlighters.
• If Paula Creamer had won a couple majors the last few years, would Carolyn Bivens still have a job?
• Is soccer in America starting to become more popular than golf?
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