Monday Scramble: Tiger, Wiesy and Freddie

Welcome to the Monday Scramble. Which are you more excited for next Monday, Tiger Woods’ pre-tournament Masters press conference or the NCAA basketball championship game?

Come to think of it, which one will media outlets talk more about the following morning? Anyway, here’s a bracket in case you want to get an office pool going.

• • •

Speaking of Tiger, is it just us, or does every story you read about him lately say the same thing?

NEWSFLASH: Tiger Woods still knows how to use golf clubs better than everyone else!

We would have only joked that it seems reporters are working off of a “Mad Libs” page, but then we found the following piece of paper on the floor of the Bay Hill media center this week...

• • •

photo

Michelle Wie

Just when we thought the craziest story of the week belonged to Soren Kjeldsen, who experienced an encounter with a nudist beachgoer gone awry during Round 2 of the European Tour’s Andalucia Open in Southern Spain, Michelle Wie started an arguement with two rules officials for what seemed like 10 on-camera minutes Sunday night during the conclusion of the Kia Classic broadcast.

The quarrel ended with Wie being penalized two strokes for grounding her club in a hazard, her appeal that she was “off balance” flat-out denied.

The penalty cost Wie, who ended in a tie for sixth after the penalty, about $75,000.

“It seems really unfair because I know I was off balance...” Wie pleaded with the officials on Golf Channel. “You were not me and you can’t give a penalty for what it looks like. You don’t know for a fact that I was not off balance.”

Not surprisingly, some golf fans immediately called into question Wie’s maturity level, a criticism that isn’t uncommon in Big Wiesy’s world, saying she was “whining” and that she “needs to grow up.”

Of course, this all could have been easily avoided had Wie, who last week announced her new sponsorship deal with McDonald’s, asked herself one simple question: What would Ronald McDonald do?

Answer: Ol’ Ronny Mac would have hit those two rules officials with free fries and gone on his McMerry way.

That’s what.

• • •

We tend to get this question a few times every year during Bay Hill week: Where is the hill at Bay Hill?

Answer: There are no hills in Orlando, Fla., nor the entire state, not counting the man-made ones at the amusement parks.

However, if we had to add a mound to Arnold Palmer’s playground, wouldn’t one on No. 18 be fun?

UPDATE: Ernie Els just won Bay Hill for his second consecutive victory on the PGA Tour, which (finally) proves one thing:

Contrary to popular belief, the Arnold Palmer Invitational does not always have to end with a Tiger Woods buzzer-beater on 18.

• • •

Freddie Couples won his third Champions Tour victory Sunday in only four starts on the 50-and-over circuit, which comes as a HUGE relief for our eyes.

We thought we were seeing things.


E-mail the Monday Scramble: mondayscramble@gmail.com

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